Thursday 11 September 2014

Cherish Your Friends



Well that's stating the flamin' obvious, isn't it? You thought, on reading the post title. However, it becomes more and more obvious to me as I get older (Cripes, she's getting serious now!!) that cherishing ones friends requires a little more than a passive amiability of attitude towards them. You have to actually WORK at cherishing. It doesn't require grandiose gestures or expensive gifts. It doesn't even, in some cases, require that you see them face to face, or make frequent phone calls. But it does require that you feel that fondness in your heart and that you - in some way - make it known to that person.


I'd also like to be pretty vague about who I mean by 'friends'. I include relatives. Old friends you've known for years, and new ones you have recently made. And yes, even Face Book friends!  I have FB friends in countries far far away who I will probably never ever get to meet, but I enjoy their 'company' and their wit and wisdom; we've shared some highs and lows along the way these last couple of years, and I think of them as Pen Pals, who give me an insight into their lives and their worlds.


Blogland is another fertile field for collecting friends too! There are bloggers who I regularly read with whom I have a pleasant, easy relationship. Hardly friendship, you might say, but we share bits of our lives, our hopes and dreams, our ups and downs, and there is something there which, if not friendship, could be on the way to becoming. Regular readers of my blog, who are in the habit of leaving me comments, I also think of as embryonic friends, especially the chatty ones, your words cheer me up, and your opinions are valued. Some of us have even met in person, and this is terrific when it happens.

Regular readers will know about my annual visit to the Burwell Bash. This is a coming together of people from all over the world, actually, to play music and be part of a very special experience. Burwell folks get together when they can, keep in touch and consider themselves true friends, even though they may only meet once a year! But year on year, I find I see more and more of my Burwell friends 'in the flesh' and it enriches my life.


So yes, quite a vague interpretation of the word 'friend', perhaps just someone whose sense of humour tickles your funny bone, and brightens your day, or some one with whom you you instantly see eye to eye on maybe only one topic - be it textiles, or music or food, or books - let us cherish those relationships too.


Cherishing requires that we keep in touch, leave a personal, private message where you would usually make it public. Hugs are (nearly) always appreciated.
A bunch of flowers, the loan or gift of some books or cds or something you have cooked or baked. Some fruit or veg from your garden to someone who doesn't grow their own. And the gift of time is very precious - we seem to have so little spare time - so a nice long phone call or a quick visit can mean the world.


I cherish my readers by always replying to their comments - I hope you remember to come back and check! And I regularly comment on other blogs, partly because it is nice to join  the conversation, and partly because it is nice to pass on the unspoken message "I am here, I hear you, and your words move me, I am responding" otherwise, well otherwise you are writing only for yourself!


Until next time, remember to cherish away to your heart's content, and believe me, you make me feel very cherished indeed! Thank you!

23 comments:

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    1. hahaha! Thank you Dc! You are among the Mentioned! Lx

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  2. The new friends that I am making, both in the flesh and in blog land are all important to me. More so now that I do not go to work. Work mates filled a special place in my life, I saw them 5 times a week and spent many hours with them, we new lots about each other and shared our ups and downs ( I have had many a tear stained shoulder) but at the end of the shift we parted company and it was out of sight, out of mind till the next one. I do miss that camaraderie and keep in touch with many, some who have returned to their homelands. However i do not miss the days of working, I do not have time to repine, I could do with an extra day each week really. All this waffle is just to say how much I agree with you, I always take the time to stop and chat, and drink the odd cup of tea if offered one, time is a gift in its own right and I am happy to give it freely.

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    1. Thanks Pam. You are one of the people I ALMOST met - probably at the 'cooking' bacon shelf in one of the supermarkets! Shame we didn't manage it before you moved, but it is lovely to read about your new life in Wales and the new friends you have made. I was exactly the same about work colleagues, great to be with but little contact away from the job. Just 'being friendly' as you so rightly say, is sometimes a huge but unknowing influence in someone's life - you just never know when you might have injected a little bit of sunshine into someone's life. Lxx

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  3. What a lovely heart warming post Lynne. Thanks for sharing; very topical to me at the present time X

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    1. Thanks Ali - you know where to come fro a natter! We never know, do we, what is going on i other folks' lives. Virtual hugs to you!! Lxx

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  4. Lovely post Lynne. And I'm with you all the way. The process of cherishing and holding one dear is a wonderful thing. It certainly brings me a lot of joy. x

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    1. Hi Inara! Thank you, yes, we both know the value of friends from near and far, eh? Lxx

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  5. oh lynne what a lovely post straight from your heart!!!! i always try to be nice to people in every day life and very rarely am i rude!!!! (i say that because i was incensed a few weeks ago in tesco when an assistant was really rude to me and i walked off not saying thank you - like i normally would - she was so rude she probably didn't even notice!!! my mum always told be to treat others as i would want them to treat me!!! have a nice weekend - carry on cherishing and i will try to do the same!! xx

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    1. Thank you Lynne; I have to say I have a short fuse - and low tolerance threshold, but am never deliberately rude to people. Icily polite, I find , usually does the trick! But on the whole I would rather make a friend than an enemy, and the very least you can do is smile! Have a good one yourself won't you? Lxxx

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  6. forgot to say i spotted your nz clock - we've got a nz mirror that we have never put up!!!! xx

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    1. Ah, actually it isn't a clock, Lynne, just a paua shell 3-dimensional map. When we moved it we didn't quite get the two islands lined up properly - we just hope no-one notices```!! Lxx

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  7. That was a lovely post. Although we will probably never meet, we have so much in common. I am a nurse, play a musical instrument or two, and stitch. I love your blog. Bev

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    1. Hello Beverley, lovely to hear from you - what a shame you have no blog I can follow and join you on! We certainly do have lots in common, and thank you for your kind comment. Lx

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  8. There's a huge amount of friendship on here you are so right. I have quite an eclectic group of friends, people from all walks of life, yes friendships are to be cherished, nurtured and never to be taken for granted! :) xxx

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    1. Ada we both know the value of friendship - and have both experienced some lovely blogging friendships, haven't we? Yes, let us cherish what we have and so keep it alive. Lxx

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  9. Unlike you, I don't have a wide circle of friends; it's never been that important to me to be honest. I don't belong to any groups or societies, no interests away from the home either. I wouldn't call the people who leave comments on my blog 'friends' either. We have no contact, know nothing more about each other than our profiles reveal... we are acquaintances perhaps, blogging chums maybe? But what I do have is a small circle of very close friends, several of whom I would call intimate friends, one or two 'kindred spirits' to quote Anne Shirley (of Green Gables if you're unfamiliar with the name), to whom I can turn any time I need to, for a shoulder, a word of advice. Even though they all live hundreds of miles away in the far reaches of North Scotland in a couple of cases, or way down in Dorset. Nobody within an hour of me, so we never meet. But we don't have the need to, there is simply this kinship, this friendship, this bond, between each of them and myself, that is just 'there'. We tell each other regularly how much we care, not in grand gestures, but maybe the occasional small unexpected gift, an 'anywhen' present I call them, something seen that I knew would appeal to a particular friend as much as it did to me. A simple poem sent on a postcard. A pretty card. We don't need to reinforce our friendship, but we do, simply because we want to. My life is made all the more richer for them, even though there's not a lot of them, or maybe because of that? Nice thoughtful post Lynne.

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    1. I think, you know, you have to take note of how I say at the beginning that I am using the word friend in its broadest sense - and including relations too. Blogging chums, as you have said, is an excellent expression. Acquaintances can be valued - yes, even cherished too! I wouldn't be so silly as to suggest that some one who makes a comment on my blog from the remotest reaches of the Antipodes is having as meaningful a relationship with me as my pal Pam from the next village, but I do value the cheeriness of said Antipodean, and have had many meaningful conversations on all topics with her. It really doesn't matter how you categorise your levels of friendship, as long as you cherish them all! Lx

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  10. Hello my cherished friend! You brought a tear to my eye with that post, especially at a time when I have just said goodbye to a friend of thirty years who has just emigrated! But ... one of the wonders of modern technology is that it is now so easy to keep in touch and keep on cherishing! xCathy

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    1. Hi CAthy, how sad to lose a friend (or indeed a family) to air miles - I know how awful that is, and you are so right - technology is a life saver. And though we have met only a few times so far, I like to know you are there, over t'other side of the county! Lxx

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  11. I've only just found this post, and what a beautiful post it is. Very well said Lynne.

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    1. And I've only just discovered where this ended up Jay! Thank you! Lxx

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